When the Almighty created Adam and Eve, in His infinite wisdom He built in the necessary procreative tools to ensure there would be lots of little Adams, Darrens, Evitas and Traceys frolicking through the Garden of Eden, all living the life of Riley till Kingdom come. Of course, as we well know, the serpent put his oar in, and the rest, as they say, is history.
But whilst the Almighty, again in His infinite wisdom, factored into woman a procreative inhibitor, known as the headache, thus giving her the occasional night off, no such inhibitor was factored into Adam. Headache be damned, if Eve wasn’t in the mood, no cold shower and a good book at bedtime was going to satisfy his carnal lust, and being weak and mortal, his fancies turned elsewhere.
Steve Wright, not that one, the other one, has just been convicted of the murders of five Ipswich prostitutes, and beneath the brutality and the tragic circumstances of the girls who were needlessly killed whilst offering their sexual favours, lies a deeper malaise which should be addressed as a matter of urgency.
Man’s carnal lust has been around since the dawn of time, as have prostitutes to service his needs. These are two incontrovertible facts, and so long as “Polite Society” ignores them, there will be more Steve Wrights, and more needless and tragic deaths. Pretending something isn’t there won’t make it go away.
So I ask, in a spirit of enquiry, why not have legalised brothels? The advantages to both clients and providers are obvious. The prostitutes can ply their trade in a comfortable and controlled environment, where they will be well protected. No need to expose themselves on dirty, unlit streets at the mercy of sexual predators. Clean and infection free bedrooms would be made available, clients would be vetted to ensure no foul play, and all the necessary protective devices would be in place. Clients would also benefit, refreshments made available, and sexual gratification guaranteed. And if the client did prove a threat, a big burly bouncer would be on hand at the press of a button. And there’d be no shortage of job applications to fill that particular post!
The only problem, as I see it, is the use of the word “brothel.” It conjures up a sordid image, and the literati among you will know it derives from the Old English, meaning “go to ruin.” Not the image I seek to cultivate in my brave new world. So I suggest a competition to choose an appropriate name, no previous experience necessary, perhaps using a premium number phone line which I shall set up as a matter of urgency, with the winner getting first crack of the whip!
To start you off, how about “Maison Rouge?” or “Maison Fanny Colline?” Over to you!Let’s do the decent thing, put aside our social inhibitions and prejudices, acknowledge the reality of the situation, and do what we can to protect some of the most vulnerable members of our society from sexual predators, and from themselves.