WHAT’S IN A TURBAN?
Religion is a funny old business, and has been around for as long as time itself. The Greeks, Romans and Pagans had gods for all seasons, my favourite by far being Bacchus, the God of wine. Curiously as things turned out, Jews and Christians share the same God, but from a different perspective. Buddhists come and go, Muslims have the promise of untold sexual pleasures once they reach the promised land, and Sikhs have their long hair and turbans to comfort them on the journey to eternal bliss.
Far be it from me to offer an opinion on the one true faith. Belief in one religion or another is invariably passed down from generation to generation, with varying degrees of zealotry, which in turn incite hatred, intolerance and an excuse for appalling crimes against non believers. Were it ever thus!
Religion, when used for the betterment of mankind, can be a positive influence on society as a whole, and if nothing else, adds a colourful dimension to an otherwise colourless but less confrontational existence.
But before I get out of my depth, I recall a recent ruling by an Employment Tribunal that a Sikh police officer was the subject of unfair discrimination when he was told to replace his turban with a standard issue helmet in preparation for riot training. He refused, presumably on grounds that it offended his religious beliefs, and he was awarded the princely sum of £10,000 for his pain and suffering.
Sikhs are, if nothing else, inventive when it comes to the conflict of religion and the law. I remember some years ago, when wearing helmets became compulsory for motor cyclists, they came up with an adapted helmet encased in a turban. That seems to satisfy both parties, and life went on. But I wonder aloud what this particular Sikh must have anticipated when he successfully applied to join the police force. Did he read the small print?
We’ve all seen riot police in full combat uniform, faintly reminiscent of Robocop, but the sad reality is that police officers routinely become the targets of gratuitous violence when they seek to come between warring factions, and unless sensible precautions are taken, serious injuries will follow.
I also wonder aloud what this particular Sikh would have done if he had been consigned to desk duties to accommodate his turban. No doubt he would have scuttled off to the same Employment Tribunal citing discrimination in the workplace. As so it goes on.
But besides the absurdity of this self inflicted wound, there is the whole question of our compensation culture, and the awards being handed down on the back of it. I remember the case of a female police officer who was routinely “goosed” by her male colleagues, which begs the question of what she was doing with her posterior to expose it to regular “goosing.” But more to the point, she was awarded a sum in excess of £100,000 for her blue bottom, if you’ll forgive the pun. According to the Judicial Studies Board’s guide to personal injuries, this is equivalent to the loss of two limbs.
We need a complete rethink about the compensation culture, and more to the point, the awards that these loony tribunals can hand down. Time and again, I have to advise clients running small businesses that a claim by a disgruntled employee, no matter how spurious, could cost them thousands, and in some cases, the difference between solvency and insolvency. I remember, some years ago, deciding to get rid of our totally incompetent senior clerk. However, as he had passed the magical twelve months in full time employment, we finished up paying him £25,000 not to darken our door again, and he was laughing all the way to the bank. To add insult to injury, we were a chambers of barristers who were supposed to know the law! Six months later, we went bust!
Time for sanity and good old fashioned common sense to prevail. Whilst I do not condone genuine discrimination in the workplace, let’s keep it in proportion. And if we can’t abolish these tribunals, then their awards must be capped. I suggest, as a starter, £100 maximum for turbans, and £50 per “goose.” That should get to the bottom of it.
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